Five Ways I'm Not Like My Mom

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work:  If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!

 

In many ways I am like my mom.  I've got hazel eyes and look like a bigger version of my short & petite mom.  I'm strong, capable, and headstrong....all things that she is.  And throughout adversity in my life I lean on God....she does that too.  

 

But my blog isn't about all the ways I'm like her.  It's about a new kind of list for the week.  This list is entitled :  5 Ways I'm Not Like My Mom

 

1. My mom grew up in Iowa on a farm and loves peace and serenity of nature.  I grew up in the city and love the hustle and bustle that makes the world work.  And, yeah, I don't like nature.

 

2. My mom loves her some Kenny Rogers.....uggh, don't even ask about how she and her best friend took my to his concert at the Iowa State Fair and embarassed me.  Truth be told I took her precious "Kenny" 8-track tapes and hide them in my closet afterwards.  It wasn't until I moved to Kansas City in my twenties & was packing things that I found them and gave them back.  

 

3. My mom can hold a grudge and crab about something to the ends of the earth.  She is the first to admit this.  She even crabs about how I can get mad and then get over it so fast....yeah, I've heard that "crab" for years from her.

 

4. My mom always thought I would be a nurse, an RN to be exact, just like her.  Rather than "a teacher that makes no money...." ahh, I digress to another one of her "crabs" about her daughter.

 

5. My mom stays strong, talks to no one about what hurts her, and let her health go when she was in her late 40's. When she was about 47 she was diagnosed with breast cancer.  From there she went on to have uterian, ovarian, and cancerous cysts in her intestines.  Why?  Because each time when she was told to do chemo she refused and thought to just splice & dice and go one like it didn't happen would work.  She is now in her 60's and has had several small brain cancer tumors taken out with other that still grow.  She sleeps most days and I rarely get to talk to the vibrant, atticulate, smart mom that raised me.  

 

Ok, why this list?  Why is that important?  Well, it's important to my story and who I am and what God has designed for my life.  He designed me to be smart, capable, articulate, and vibrant like my mom.  He also designed me to be forgiving without care, not to like Kenny Rogers (sorry), and to love art, music, and the city.  He designed me to want to help people like my mom did as a nurse but in a different way as a teacher.  And when it came to my health he allowed me try to run, ignore, and not talk about it like my mom.  But that didn't work for me much like it hasn't worked for her.  I literally was at the end of my rope and found the God of forgiveness that was has been waiting for me all alone.  That is one thing that my mom did know all alone but I ran from.  

 

Unlike my mom I choose after a year of running to accept what the doctor's needed to do and what their best course of action for me right now is.  I went to Dr. Angell with Emily this week.  Dr. Angell shared with me that my surgery went "beautifully"....even better than those with normal removal of the ovaries.  She said when they got in a saw all the scar tissue they would have to go through, that my left ovary and the mass were adhered to my abdominal wall that she and the other surgeon knew they were in for a challenge and it was going to take time.  Normal removal of ovaries is about 2 hours and they were able to get done in 45 minutes.  She said she had no idea why it had went so easy and well but it did.  I told her I thought it was a "God Thing" and she smiled and said she was thankful for it.   Pathology showed that there were some bad cells on my left ovary.  But the course of care is to remove the ovaries and the fallopian tubes.  This has been done which is a blessing!  

 

What happens now?  I go and see Dr. Angell throughout this year.  Because I am now considered "high risk" for cancer I will have a couple of mammograms a year.  And, I'll have some other tests done if I still have problems with nausea.  She also thought it would be good for me to re-connect with Donna, my cancer counselor, and talk with her about things.  But, the remarkable thing is that I'm cancer free as of this moment.  All those bad cells, worries, frets, and fears are gone.   I'm not living my mom's nightmare.  

I wanted to get back with all of you that have prayed, sent me messages, and been so kind. I'm sorry I didn't get this wrote earlier.  Yesterday, Emily and I went and celebrated by having lunch and then coming home for me to rest.  I've got to the end of January to recover.  The incision on my right side is larger than the left because once they got the left ovary & mass detached they couldn't get it to go through the left side and had to take it through the right.  So, yes, I get tired easier than I would like to right now.  

Can I tell you what the best part of yesterday was once I heard from Dr. Angell?  I wore a pair of boots that I bought this last fall.  I've only worn them twice because when I bend I've had such extreme pain that felt like hard contractions in child birth and it just wasn't worth it.  Yesterday, I was able to put on those boots, zip them up, and take them off all without pain....wooo-hooo!  In many ways I know that I'm not like my mom....yes there are more than five!  But in many ways I'm her girl....if you ever question that just refer to my best of my day from yesterday.  Yes, I learned the ways of being a "fashionista" from her.

Again, thank you for your prayers, kind words, and sharing what you've been through.  It has all been a sweet blessing to me and a learning process for me.  I've learned to share my thoughts, feelings, and fears with each of you......yeah, and my small circle of trust has turned into an outstanding circle of friends that are as close to me as family.  The sweetest reward is that I know that I'm cared about and that I need to accountable in my health.  I know this next year will be amazing because I'm accountable for my health, I've got family & friends that are willing to walk with me through the worst of days and the best, and that God is truly the one that will hold me up and support me through it all.  

Peace Be With You-Sherry