Hitting A Nerve

 Let not mercy and kindness [shutting out all hatred and selfishness] and truth [shutting out all deliberate hypocrisy or falsehood] forsake you; bind them about your neck, write them upon the tablet of your heart. [Col. 3:9-12.]

The past months I've been working on listening.  Instead of giving advice or trying to be a "fixer" I've been choosing to listen.  It's been a hard choice for this boisterous, outspoken gal but it's what I've been hearing in my heart and spirit to do.

These past couple of weeks I'm realizing why God has been prepping me throughout the past months to be a listener. I've had some situations personally that took me taking me out of the equation to fully understand what my loved one had to say.  I've got a health scare right now with precancerous polyps and growths in my intestines that have me taking me out of the situation and listening to what needs to be done.  I also have been blessed to have some close gal pals contact me asking me to pray for them because they know that I will. I love that they have sought me out to tell what is happening and ask for my prayers because they know I love God like them, have been through things, and still I'm  vigilant for the Lord.

Yesterday I felt the need to listen beyond what I could have considered....I'm a fixer at heart, an enabler at my weakest, and a bossy babe at my worst.  What happened?  I was compelled to go out and clean my front stoop.  Why?  I didn't really know because I'm not really a great housekeeper.  But something within me said get out there and clean that stoop....it didn't even stop long enough for me to sip my morning coffee.  I said, "Ok, God, I get it you want the front of the house to look nice" and I walked out the front door to start to clean.  As I was cleaning a car passed and slowed down.  The driver stopped in the middle of the road, looked at me and backed up and into my driveway.  All, I could think is, geez, whose that and what are they doing.  They parked in my driveway and got out of the car and said, "Sherry?". 

I looked and it was one of Emily's friends that she grew up with.  He went into the military after high school and we haven't seen him for a little over two years.  And, that same kid that I knew looked like a shell of his former self.  I came down from the stoop to the driveway and gave him a hug.  I asked how he was doing and he told me about being in the reserves now and working. I told him about my cancer scare in January and about the artroom.  He then looked at me and asked if he could tell me what was really going on....and my heart skipped a beat.  All I could do was say yes and sit down.  He told me that he's been feeling overwhelmed, about his relationship with a girl that's toxic, and that he came back to Pleasant Hill looking for someone to talk to.  He said that as he drove into town he realized that he didn't have anyone and so he drove to the cemetery and sat there with his cousin and grandpa and talked with them and then just laid on their graves and cried.  My mom's heart wants to fix him, my enabler wants to take him in, and my bossy babe says suck it up....but none of those came out.  The listener came out.....I sat and listened to him.  I didn't say a word.  After he was done I told him he has Christ forever and always to listen to him and prayed with him.

It made me think of what a listener does.  They listen , pray, and go on.  There is nothing that we can fix, enable, or boss that will work in someones life or our own.  We have to let it go to God.  And, then we are free to walk in courage and dignity to meet the days challenges.  I asked about his parents and family.  He shared he hadn't seen them in a while and that he didn't think they even cared.  I told him that the parents that I've known did.  I shared with him that sometimes you have to be ready to be done with your life, what you've done and who you've become.  You have to be willing to shut the door on it, lock it, and throw away the key.  Once you can do that you are ready to start over with what God intends for your life.

He stayed the day with our family, hung out, ate, and slept.  I felt like he just needed a landing spot for a day and was happy we were it.  I thanked God last night that He gave me the ability to listen.  I thanked God for telling me to clean the stoop.  And, I prayed over the kiddo that was at my stoop yesterday and asked for God's protection over him.  I asked God to center & focus the kid back on God and drop the rest.  I prayed for his parents to be welcoming to him when that time came.  

In the end, isn't it that we are designed to listen to God?  We are designed to act and do God's will when He asks.  It's hard to shut out the noise from around us, to not envelop ourselves in our owness, and to reach out to listen. I know that since I've been able to do this I feel a calmness that roars over me when things get hard.  I feel a peace that allows me to walk in courage and with dignity when I would rather crawl away.  And, I have a gusto in my step, words, and actions that isn't bossy it's bold with a knowledge of what God intends for me to do. 

It's scary to shut down the rest of the world.  It's scary to say your BFF is Christ and not an earthly person.  And, it's even bolder to sit in silence and listen to what God says and then act.  I pray that you have the courage to silence the world & listen for God to speak to your heart and breathe life into your spirit. 

Peace Be With You- Sherry

Updates:

• I'm praying over an artroom schedule for August.  I've got ideas of workshops/classes I want to incorporate but am needing to hear that I'm on the right path.
• Once Em & Dale are back in school I'm planning to free myself to go back to the Cancer Institute to meet with Donna about what are the next steps to take with my health.  I've neglected this over the summer and am feeling tired & fatigue.
• I'm loving how God is using our home as a creative haven for kids & adults.  I'm praying that continues .
• Pray for our family as we are in a transition time in our lives.  We are trying to hunker down on what God's path for each of us and together are.  Both Ted & I have been deliberating how God wants us to serve him, inc what capacity, and where.