Reliable Reaasurance

Have you ever felt the reassured that things are going to be all right?  Maybe it was through a letter, a phone call, or just a feeling in the pit of your stomach.  I can honestly say that has happened a zillion times in my lifetime.  Things are a mess and then something small happens and you just know its gonna be all right. 

The sense of stability, my own know how, and capabilities are being put to the test this year.  Not only with my battle with cancer but within our own family.  There seems to be a presence that is unsettling, relentless in its pursuit, and that I can't define.  This week I took a step back to reflect, meditate, and ask God what gives.

What I heard was the stillness & peace.  The kind of peace that comes into your heart, radiates through your body and just leaves you with warmth.  I asked God again "what is going on" within our home and again there was the stillness and peace.  As a talkative chick I just couldn't let it rest.  I had to have words to put with it and a reassurance in words that all was going to be all right.  Know what I got?  Stillness and peace. 

This morning I went to write in my journal and wrote the lyrics to an old Julian Lennon song that I used to love , Let Me Be.  It wasn't so much in the journaling of old song lyrics but the message I felt it bring to my heart.  "Some people say that your going away but I've been assured that your going to stay so please let me be".  Then it hit me.  This year I've been withdrawn and just wished at times to be alone.

After writing the lyrics in my journal I again felt stillness and peace.  I again took time to reflect and meditate on my life and circumstances.  I again gave God praise for sticking beside me when I would rather say "just let me be".

Today, I head back to KC to continue radiation treatments. That is my task this week and then they will do a scan later this week to see if the radiation is helping.  I love that God leads me to connect the dots to my own questions, that he uses music as a guide, and past experiences to inspire me.  All that being said I'm thankful for the serenity of stillness & peace in this season of my life that feels everything but quiet and peaceful. 

It is in my prayers that most of you can see through God's silent times and find that in reality he was there all along.  Find that His stillness & peace can crash into your chaotic circumstances and leave you with an overwhelming sense of calm.

Hoping that each of you are able to weather through the storms that you face in life.  That when you don't hear God you don't hear abandonment by your Heavenly Father but the stillness & peace that he is gifting to you through your storm.

Peace be with you- Sherry

Updates:

• Dale returned from south Dakota on Saturday.  My son who is always quiet was full of tales to tell us and we stayed up until 11 just to hear them.  He saw what extreme poverty looks like and really connected with the kids & community he served. If you get a chance to ask Dale about his trip do it....and leave some time for him to share.
• Emily is headed back to Gilda's Club this afternoon to work with the preschoolers in their kids program.  The counselor that is charge of the program came and talked to me last week and told me how remarkable Emily is and what an asset to the program....love that.
• My broken foot is healing and my oncologist was not impressed by it what so ever.  I told him that if I can have a sense of humor about it he needs to too....needless to say I'm still waiting for him to crack a smile. 
• Finally, thanks to each of you for your prayers & kind words.